When people leave a job they never really liked they always try to leave with a bang to try to make it memorable. An acquaintance of mine did the same thing. I think. Check out his resignation letter.
*** The names in the following letter have been changed to protect the identity of the parties involved. ***
Hi Kristen and Nicole.
I am emailing you with a heavy heart and brain, as I have sad news.
In the front up, Nicole, I would like to advise you that I stopped by your office three times today, and you were not available. However, I understand that you are busy as director of advanced technological research at Vanderlay Industries. I would have liked to talk to you about this directly, but alas, it was not the will of God.
Kristen, I also called you numerous times (only to get voicemail), and also emailed you. I did not feel comfortable leaving a voicemail about the matter at hand. You will probably understand why by the end of this email.
Kristen and Nicole, I am only writing this to gain your acceptance and approval as a friend, as it is too difficult to say out loud. Also, I am writing to you in complete confidence, as I have not told many others about this.
A while back, I attended a conference for a group that I am associated with. At this conference of like-minded souls, I got to talking to an elderly person about Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis and other diseases of the lungs.
He was a very knowledgeable man and I was listening intently. Suddenly, his finger was in my buttocks.
As you can imagine, I have gone through immense emotional, psychological, physical, mental, respiratory and intestinal trauma. I am VERY uncomfortable talking about this, but I thought you guys had the right to know as I am under your reign as an employee.
Hopefully, this may help explain my performance over the last little while, in regards to my performance metrics. I tried to keep my chin up, but it’s hard when you’ve got other pains in lower extremities. I want to apologize personally to any customer that I did not assist with 100% vigour and enthusiasm. If this can be arranged, please let me know and I will contact each one.
In the end, I am just not mentally able to assist customers at this time. I have noticed my mind has not been sharp, crisp and precise during calls lately. I don’t even remember some days at work after leaving. It’s like the Twilight Zone or something. It is because of this, that I must ask and advise the following options.
(1) If it can be arranged, I would like a leave of absence to recover physically, so I can walk straight, and mentally, so I can talk straight.
(2) If this cannot be arranged, I am tendering my resignation immediately, as I am not able to continue work at this time in my current state.
Whatever your decision may be, working at Vanderlay Industries has been a worthwhile and fulfilling experience. Getting calls after calls from monotonous clients droning on and on about their problems may be repetitive and boring for some, but not for me! Thinking of my life devoid of Vanderlay Industries and the amazing people I have encountered on this journey makes me want to ball up and cry for hours, but I am determined to forge on if need be.
God Bless you both into the nether regions of heaven,
Thanks
P.S If nothing can be arranged and I must go with option 2, please advise where I can return my Secret Passcard, T-Shirt and headset.
P.P.S If nothing can be arranged and I must go with option 2, can I get a reference letter, so I can try to continue my journey in the field of call centre customer service.
Mr. Samuel L Smith
Customer Service
Vanderlay Industries
Winner of one Employee of the Week Award